By KT and The Whyman
The controversy over the issue of self-esteem and its place in a Christian's life rages on. This post addresses some in the Christian quarters who believe that self-esteem is similar to love, or specifically self-love, as well as those who believe that the concept of self-esteem is taught in the Bible even if the word itself is absent from Scripture.
First of all, 'Self' has no part in the plan of God. Self is humanistic and, dare we say, Satanic to the core.
You can’t spiritually help anyone without telling them the uncompromising truth of the Word. Paul tells Timothy,
“… Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all long-suffering and doctrine” (2 Timothy 4:1-5).
This necessarily means upsetting their ‘self-esteem’ when the Biblical reality of our wicked selfish sinfulness and inability to do anything about it by our own actions is pointed out. If there is no chastening, then God cannot deal with our pride. Paul was buffeted so he would not become prideful because of his many revelations. But many today do not have any chastening in their Christian walk, and actually think that this is the way it is supposed to be. It is a fearful thing to know that God is not chastening a person in order to correct him in his walk. It may mean he is not walking with God at all.
The more mature a Christian becomes, the more aware of how sinful and yes, evil we actually are in comparison to God. Does this hurt our egos, our 'self-esteem' to the point that we cannot function? No, hardly. Just the opposite in fact, as we can then recognise our worth from God’s perspective since though we deserve eternal punishment, He still loved us enough to die for our sins.
A Hebrew/Greek lexicon search for the various usages and meanings of the word love (self or otherwise) reveals that the Bible doesn't even hint at anything even remotely related to self esteem: Hebrew - 'ahab - loves, amours; `egeb - (sensuous) love; 'ahabah - human love for human, God's love to His people; 'dowd - beloved, uncle loved one, beloved uncle love; `agabah -lustfulness; 'chashaq - to love, be attached to, long for; 'racham - love deeply, have mercy, be compassionate.
Greek - agapē - brotherly love, affection, good will, love, benevolence; phileō - to be fond of, to like, warm affection; philadelphos - loving like a brother, loving one's brethren; philandros - loving one's husband; philarguria - love of money; philoteknos - loving one's offspring or children; philadelphia - love of brothers or sisters; philanthrōpia - love of mankind, benevolence, love toward man.
The only exception which was used ONCE in scripture is philoprōteuō - "to aspire to pre-eminence, to desire to be first", and it is used in a negative manner in 3 John 1:9-10 where the person in question was so puffed up with self-importance that he needed to be cast out of the congregation!
'Love' and 'self-esteem' do not share the same category and are actually polar opposites in regard to definition! A closer word to the definition of self-esteem (which has its origins only from the 19th century) is therefore not love, but rather, selfishness or *pride*.
“... for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble. Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in *due time*” (1Peter 5: 5b-6).
That "due time" is not now. Until He says so in His timing in the renewed creation, it is not when we “feel” like it. (ie now.)
We all have pride to some degree, and pride keeps us from living in faith. Pride is self-dependence; we think we can accomplish something on our own. Pride means to think more highly of oneself compared to another, it is an overestimation of ourselves. It is thinking we deserve something when in fact we do not.
Jesus was our example of humility. He, being God, yet came lowly, in humility to rescue prideful selfish man (Philippians 2:5-8). He had the true power to call on legions of angels and cause what is not to come into existence. But He did not use this power for himself in any way.
Unfortunately today the church is rarely told this but instead Jesus becomes a 'self-esteem booster' to grant to us our own dreams and wants. Everything we have as Christians came through much suffering and Christ’s death on the cross. It is all done through HIS works and HIS grace. But grace can only be given if we walk according to his ways of humility. This means an emptying of self.
“Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it” (Mark 10:15).
We should not be esteeming the self. We should be 'esteeming' the One who truly deserves it ... and that isn't "self".
So, which authority will we submit to, the Word of God who clearly says that selfishness is something that God abhors, or the word of man who says that we all need to build ourselves up first before we can do anything?
"But ...
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